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Prank Phone Call Reveals Dark Side of Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker

by George Jones on March 4, 2011

There is nothing quite like a well-done prank, especially when it reveals that which you otherwise would just suspect.

The prank phone call to Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker was a classic.  While the Governor’s television appearances conveyed the beady-eyes and prickly disposition of a shithouse rat, the phone call cleared up any misperceptions about the character of Wisconsin’s chief executive.

Basically, he’s an ass-hat.


Ass-hats are never in style

While this term could be appropriately applied to a person of any political persuasion, this should really only apply to those that have sold their souls to overlords of any persuasion, be they a corporate weenie or union hedgehog.

What makes Wisconsin’s governor attractive to both terriers and conservatives alike is more than his verminous appearance or ability to argue persuasively with more progressively-minded citizens.

What appeals to conservatives – and the powerful corporate interests that fund them – is the willingness to contemplate less savory end-justifies-the-means type of behavior.  They don’t want to just win the battle, but humiliate and disenfranchise the weaker party.  Such is the malevolent providence of those drunk with power.

Governor Walker didn’t want to just get wage and benefit concessions from the union membership – he wanted to expunge the union from the face of the earth.

You do have to give Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker credit: he knows where his bread is buttered.  David Koch, the person impersonated in the prank phone call, is not part of Governor Walker’s constituency, but he got about a half-hour of Governor Walker’s precious time.  That isn’t just sucking up – that’s the political equivalent of a blow-job.

Sort of how I picture the Koch-Walker relationship

Typically, you’d think that with the looming financial crisis and the state capitol besieged by malcontents imported from the 1970’s (at least according to Governor Walker supporters), the governor would be far too busy to take a phone call from someone not intimately involved in solving the financial crisis or getting all of those non-residents (according to Governor Walker) out of the Wisconsin Statehouse.

Unfortunately, the Koch brothers purchased the Tea Party a while back and their bankroll is key to the political aspirations of any conservative candidate – and Governor Walker knows this.  He may have an earnest interest in balancing the ledger in Wisconsin, but he wants to do it in a way that polishes his conservative credentials.  He just didn’t think he’d slip on his own tongue in the process.

In the prank phone call Governor Walker tells the fake Koch brother that he considered planting disruptive elements amongst the protestors – an admission that should make everyone’s skin crawl.

Thank God Governor Walker doesn't have one ...

Governor Walker's Death Star

That infamous ‘trash heap of history’ is chock-full of powerful people who thought these type of thoughts.  I don’t think America’s beloved “cheese-heads” in Wisconsin deserve a chief executive sitting that close to the dark side.  If Governor Walker had his own Death Star, I shudder to think what Alderaan’s fate would be.

We should be thankful that amongst the sea of humanity in and around the Wisconsin Statehouse are pranksters with ingenuity and pluck.  Without their clever efforts, we might not have fully appreciated the dark nature of Wisconsin’s governor or the nature of his link to an infamous corporate overlord.

We would no doubt figure out he was an ass-hat, though.

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